September 2021.
After quite a few years of awful things happening to our family, including deaths, the worse possible thing happened. My biggest loss of all and with it, a huge part of me. In the past I got a lot “oh, you’re so strong.” I wasn’t. There’s a huge difference to being strong and having to be strong because there’s no other choice. This time, I had nothing left to give. As well as all this there were other complications. I was running on empty. Forget fight or flight. I had no fight left in me and no strength to flee. I did my best to hide away from the world and make myself as invisible as possible going out and about. I had a wonderful, small group of friends around me, but they couldn’t be there all the time.
September 2022.
The unthinkable. Another loss and with it my reason for venturing outside. I was done. This really was rock bottom. The urge to be invisible was bigger. This, by far, was the very worse I’d ever been. There was still a support group around me. But with the best will in the world, others still had a normal life that they could live and things they needed to do.
October 2022.
I don’t know why, but one Thursday I decided that was the day I was going down to the Baptist church in West Green to see this group. I managed to get there, but I was late. After trying to decide what to do for a bit, I decided I’d got there, if they didn’t let me in because they’d started, I just wouldn’t go back. So I knocked at the door, turned the handle and took a step inside. When you get to that bit, outside the door, that’s the scary bit. But once you’re in the room, you’ll be met with friendliness and kindness. I went in, people smiled, someone got me a chair, and that was it. They can’t make everything better, or provide you with a happy ever after but they can and do give you so much. How much or how little you speak is up to you. Everything that is said in that room is completely confidential. It’s a safe space for all women.
I’m so glad something made me go that day. I’ve been surrounded by love and support through my many highs and lows ever since. I’ve been privileged to hear and give to support to everyone else in the group. Everyone has a story. Each story is as important as everyone else’s . We talk, we cry, we laugh, we share. What I would do without my group, I don’t know. It’s my safety net. A place I can enjoy friendships that have been made. And so much more. All because three very special and incredible ladies had an idea and brought it to life.
The group has grown into an established, friendly, wonderful group. A little while back, for various reasons and for some of the members, we went our own way. We were the first Sistershare, followed quickly by another.😊 But when we branched off on our own, we changed our name. Less confusion! So now we are Sisterhood. Same ideas, same principles, still with huge amounts of friendship and support. All wrapped up into our Sisterhood group. One of our founding ladies has also set up our Sisterhood online group. People can attend either or both. Honestly, if I was in charge of medals and honours, I would bestow so many on the 3 who came up with this group and made it a reality. They have welcomed and helped so many women. They’re incredible and I’m so thankful for all they’ve done and continue to do.
Recently we turned 4. I still go, it gives me such a lot and is a big part of my life. We meet 3 out of 4 weeks on a Thursday afternoon between 12.30 and 2.30 at the Baptist Church in West Green. You can come as much or as little that you want. As I said earlier, we talk, we smile, we cry, we laugh. Somehow at the end of the group I always come away feeling lighter. So maybe try that first step and push open the door. You’ll be met with unconditional friendship. The only question you’ll be asked is, Would you like a cup of tea (coffee and water are also available!) and a biscuit?
